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04:13Evet, çok daha thanizzed.
04:19Ben böyle, içeriye kadar usk adım.生日ken
04:21başka bir morul var. Çünkü genelde
04:24var. Rundan sonido
04:29gelip bir gelip. Şiiraptan
04:30biz de, buraya hesaplar vermeliydi. Evet. Tüm sen,
04:32eğin
04:32bir iyağın? O, çok önemli. Evet.
04:35Ne oldu? Daha fazla
04:36alıştconf
04:36şekilde? İçini.
04:38Çeviri ve
04:39İzlediğiniz için teşekkür ederim.
04:40Bu bir şey.
04:46Bu ne?
04:47Bu ne?
04:48Bu ne?
04:49Bu ne?
04:50Bu ne?
04:51Bu ne?
04:51Bu ne?
04:51Bu ne?
04:52Bu ne?
04:54Bu ne?
04:56Bu ne?
04:58Bu ne?
05:00Bu ne?
05:00I don't know how.
05:01Thank God for that.
05:07The occupants of the new house had been a present from my oldest daughter.
05:13Ten guinea fowl.
05:15Who'd made the barn where we'd been keeping them smell absolutely unbelievable.
05:22Have you got food?
05:24They are.
05:29It's so bad.
05:30Fucking it reeks.
05:31It is vile.
05:33Right.
05:34Oh God I'm gagging already.
05:36Let me get in then.
05:37I'll catch you and bark them to you.
05:38Yep.
05:38Perfect.
05:41There we go.
05:43Yep.
05:44We've got a new house.
05:45Hello little fella.
05:52That's it.
05:53Is that finished?
05:54Yeah.
05:55Well done.
05:55Well done.
05:56That's a great job.
05:58Before moving the birds down to their new home in a nearby copse, there was a small diddly-squat
06:04celebration to take care of.
06:08Gee dog.
06:10Hello Jamie.
06:11Here you go birthday boy.
06:13This is lovely.
06:14Well it will be if I get it lit.
06:16Hang on.
06:17We bought candles that literally will not light.
06:20Gerald I'm so sorry for this.
06:22I know.
06:24How old are you today?
06:2678.
06:27We got you a stripper.
06:29Oh.
06:30Yeah.
06:30He'll be here in a minute.
06:34Ready?
06:35Play that out.
06:36There we go.
06:37Perfect.
06:37Happy birthday.
06:38Happy birthday Gerald.
06:40Happy birthday guys.
06:41Happy birthday G-Dog.
06:43Do you know anything about guinea fowl Gerald?
06:46Well they get the wattles.
06:48Then when you're out at night, they just run another like buggery.
06:51So I just think they're all cock birds.
06:53I'll play you to start with.
06:55Mental they go after one another.
06:57On the cone.
06:58But every one of them had it.
07:00One of them big long ones.
07:02It looked so sad.
07:04Yeah.
07:05We've been told to keep them in that box for five days.
07:08Yeah.
07:09That one I see.
07:10Making a knife.
07:11You get all of them.
07:12And then the boys might cross.
07:13You'll hear them down the village.
07:14No trouble.
07:15What it's doing now is raining on us.
07:19Yeah.
07:19Do we leave the door of the house open or closed now?
07:21Well I think we should.
07:22I think we should.
07:23They're escaping.
07:24No they're not in there now.
07:26They're in here.
07:27What?
07:28There's one on the lamp.
07:29Oh shit.
07:30We haven't got them all.
07:31There's one more.
07:33There's two in there.
07:34What?
07:35There are two in there.
07:36Can you two not count?
07:37You morons.
07:43Once the missing two had been loaded I gingerly set off to the cops.
07:50Oh bloody hell.
07:53Oh god this is so bloody...
07:56Oh no.
08:00And on the way I got a bit of a shock.
08:03What's that sheep doing in the...
08:06Who's had a lamb?
08:11Look.
08:15The sheep has got a placenta hanging out of its arse.
08:17This is just born.
08:20Hang on.
08:23This is a...
08:24This is odd because these are not the easy care sheep which we know are pregnant.
08:30These are difficult care sheep which are supposed to be turned into mutton at the pub.
08:35They're not supposed to be pregnant.
08:37I mean how have you got pregnant?
08:40How's this Caleb?
08:43Oh look.
08:44Yeah but the weird thing is where's the ram come from?
08:47Exactly.
08:49To try and get to the bottom of this mystery I call Jeremy our shepherd.
08:55It's a bit bizarre.
08:56The only thing I can imagine is that before the lambs were weaned off he's still had his balls and
09:02he's got a costume.
09:04But what we've got is incest going on here.
09:07You've got incest and you've got...
09:09There is another possibility we ought to consider.
09:13Virgin birth.
09:14It's been documented as something that can occur.
09:19Perhaps the...
09:21Perhaps Jesus.
09:22Well he did a human last time.
09:24We've been expecting the second coming haven't we?
09:27Who ever said it was going to be a human?
09:29It could be a sheep.
09:30That could be Jesus.
09:32I'm telling you that lamb is called Jesus and we are keeping that sheep.
09:37No we're not.
09:37We bloody well are.
09:38We are not.
09:39You're not going to butcher Jesus.
09:40It's not fucking Jesus.
09:42That sheep is going.
09:43It is Jesus.
09:43It's going to rear that lamb and then it's going to go for mutton.
09:46Then it's going to come back.
09:47You're going to eat it and then complain about heartburn.
09:48We're going to eat the Virgin Mary.
09:49Yes you are.
09:50That's the Virgin Mary.
09:51It's not.
09:54After this the two wise men and one wise woman took the guinea fowl to their new woodland lodgings.
10:03There?
10:04Yeah.
10:04Lovely.
10:05That looks pretty good.
10:08They have to be in there now for five days.
10:11Yeah.
10:11So that they know what home is.
10:13Okay.
10:14They're looking a bit discombobulated.
10:16I'm not surprised.
10:17Well they've had a bit of an exciting afternoon.
10:26With Alan's refurb work complete, the pub was now open again.
10:35And while I was over there, his cheerfulness asked for a meeting as he'd worked out our trading results for
10:42the first four months.
10:43Jeremy.
10:46Hey Charlie, how are you?
10:47Alright, thanks.
10:49You know, I thought I had two copies.
10:51I did.
10:52I've, I've, I've, I've...
10:58I've just gone down to the bottom.
11:00Yes.
11:01Profit before taxation, which gives me hope.
11:03Yes.
11:05Minus, minus, minus, minus 8,486 pounds.
11:10Yeah.
11:12So...
11:13That's the headline figure.
11:14We're losing money.
11:15I...
11:17You are, overall.
11:20We're fully booked every day.
11:21Yep.
11:23Couldn't get any more people in if we tried.
11:25You know, I'm, I'm stumped.
11:27We've got people coming and we're losing money.
11:31And it's partly the success that's causing the additional cost.
11:37Because the infrastructure of the pub can't cope.
11:39We're having to clean out the cesspit twice a week.
11:43We're having to do the grease extraction twice a week.
11:46Because, you know, it was built for a pub that did, you know, as many covers in a month.
11:51Uh, really.
11:52Um, parking attendants, you know, to try and make sure that we didn't have chaos on the A40.
11:58You know, we had this fleet of parking attendants.
12:00Well, we've...
12:01No, I know.
12:01It's £47,000 a month in parking.
12:03We were paying parking people.
12:04Yeah.
12:05And I, I just think that's probably...
12:06So, okay.
12:07Because the costs are what they are, aren't they?
12:09We are successful.
12:10I mean, in as much as a lot of people come.
12:12Yeah.
12:12So, you do have to empty the cesspit a lot.
12:15You do have to...
12:16Yeah.
12:16...clean the structures out quite a lot.
12:18We do have to worry about the parking, otherwise the council will go crazy.
12:21So, we know we have these costs.
12:23Yeah.
12:24So, another thing I thought, which is controversial, is putting prices up.
12:29Well, I've just, I've actually gone to the trouble of having a survey of all the other pubs in the
12:35area done.
12:36So, if you take a starter, right, meat and bread.
12:40Yeah.
12:41So, we've got chicken, liver parfait and sourdough, okay?
12:44Yeah.
12:44We're cheaper than any other pub in the area.
12:48We're £9.50.
12:49Yeah.
12:49All the others are around £12, £12.50, £15 at the Bull in Charlbury.
12:55A steak pie.
12:56Yeah.
12:57We're the cheapest.
12:58So, we are fundamentally cheaper.
13:01Now, this is the interesting thing.
13:04If you actually look at the news coverage this place gets, and there's a fair bit of it.
13:08Yeah.
13:09This is from the Express, okay?
13:12Disgruntled punters have been moaning about the prices of the meals on offer.
13:16For example, if you want to dine on steak, carrot, mash and cabbage at the pub, it'll cost you £28.
13:21So, every newspaper, every single time this pub is mentioned, they all say the same thing.
13:29This pub is expensive.
13:30Now, the fact is, we're cheaper.
13:33Yep.
13:33So, here we are, with a totally unfounded reputation in the Mirror, the Mail, the Express and all of the
13:39newspapers, that we're expensive when we're not.
13:41Yeah.
13:42I mean, bearing in mind, as you say, our ingredients are costing more than all these other pubs.
13:46Yeah.
13:47You know, we're paying more for the food than any other pub and charging less.
13:51So, we have to put the prices up.
13:53And I think we can put the prices up to what people think we're charging anyway.
13:58Yeah.
13:59Okay.
14:00Oh, shit.
14:02I'm sure we'll turn it round.
14:05But we've got to get a fair return.
14:06Why did you let me buy a pub?
14:07I tried not to.
14:08I know you did.
14:09So, I now have two loss-making businesses.
14:12I shall buy a cinema next.
14:18And then, just when I thought things couldn't get more financially bleak, David the Butcher asked for a meeting to
14:26talk about my rare breed, Sandy and Black pigs.
14:34Oh, look at the face.
14:36Oh, he's got...
14:37Well, I'll take that off so you don't have to look at it any more.
14:40Just...
14:42I just...
14:44That doesn't make it better!
14:48What are you making? Bacon or just...
14:52Erm...
14:52In complete truth,
14:54we can't do much for these apart from sausages.
14:57Oh, shit, really?
14:59Yeah.
15:00I'll show you what I mean.
15:04If you came into the counter and we kind of gave you that, I don't think you'd be too happy.
15:09You'd cook it off and it's just like cooking a load of fat, you see.
15:13Is this yours?
15:14Yeah, that's what we're looking for.
15:18It's just...
15:19It's much bigger in comparison, but the fat that's going through that because of the breed, it's just too much.
15:27I mean, I can see the problem. I'm not going to promise you, well, I couldn't argue with you anyway,
15:32because you guys are butchers and I'm not.
15:34But I can straight away see that this is, you know, primarily fat, isn't it?
15:39Yes.
15:40Is that a characteristic of the sandy and black?
15:42Yeah.
15:43Which is why it became a rare breed, because people would rather eat that.
15:47Yes.
15:48Yeah, it's got more meat in it.
15:51Oh, all that effort and we've got sausages.
15:54Very nice sausages, I might add.
15:56Yeah, no, delicious, I'm sure.
15:58Very expensive sausages to produce.
16:04It's loss-making in that, really, isn't it?
16:12Shit.
16:13It is a tough game, pig farming.
16:16Still, look at it this way.
16:18At least the pub's losing money.
16:27That had been a bad day.
16:31But the following morning, things looked rosier.
16:36As my high-tech, driverless tractor had arrived.
16:46My God, what a fantastic-looking thing this is.
16:51The Agbot.
16:53I mean, it was quite fun seeing it in the NEC, but seeing it on a farm is when you
16:59realise just how...
17:03fantastically futuristic it is.
17:06It's Dutch, isn't it?
17:08Yeah, built in Holland.
17:09Diesel engine, generator, two electric motors.
17:12Right, so the diesel engine powers the generator.
17:16And that then powers the two electric motors.
17:19Oh, so, okay, like a modern-day Royal Navy destroyer.
17:22Hmm.
17:23Highly efficient.
17:24Don't lose any power in the drive train.
17:28Will, who'd first shown me the Agbot at Lama, then explained how it was able to operate on its own
17:34in a world full of rules and lawsuits.
17:38The first thing is two GPS receivers.
17:41So one does the primary navigation, one checks.
17:44Because what is the satellite in cars now?
17:47They're accurate to within...
17:48A couple of metres.
17:48A couple of metres.
17:49So this is two within...
17:50Two centimetres.
17:51Just under an inch in old-fashioned money.
17:53Next.
17:54On the top, the little blue-coloured dome, a rotating laser beam, for want of a better description.
17:59Okay.
17:59Scans 30 metres around the Agbot.
18:02Oh, if it detects...
18:03If it detects something, it will begin to slow down.
18:05And stop.
18:06So our dogs, for example, which are not the most well-trained dogs in the world.
18:10Yeah.
18:10If the dog were to run in front of it, it would stop.
18:13Slow down and stop.
18:14Yeah.
18:15If all that fails, that, if we touch that, the machine will stop dead in the field.
18:20So it's a great many safety features.
18:23Multiple layers and functional safety.
18:25Yes.
18:27Despite all this Terminator-style independence, the Agbot can be driven by a human.
18:36But for that, you need a gaming controller.
18:40To take the brake off, one click this way.
18:44Okay.
18:45Set.
18:46So now the machine is live.
18:49Forward.
18:55Left and right is on this one.
19:01Oh, my God, this is so...
19:03This is like the remote-controlled toy you always wanted.
19:11See, all those years on Call of Duty...
19:15Even better.
19:16Will told me that a job I'd never mastered in five years,
19:21hitching things to the back of a tractor,
19:24would now be a doddle.
19:28Right.
19:30Nearly there.
19:32Whoa, whoa, whoa.
19:33Yeah, we're there.
19:35Go forward a little, tiny bit.
19:41There you go.
19:42I did a thing!
19:43I actually hooked a thing!
19:46In!
19:46There you go.
19:47I did a whole thing!
19:48Well done, proper job.
19:49Me!
19:50I did that!
19:53This is properly raining now.
19:55Should we retire to the office for five minutes?
19:56Yeah, I think we need a cup of coffee to have a think about this.
20:00It's at times like this,
20:02you actually do need a tractor with a cab to be in.
20:06That is the drawback.
20:08I've just uncovered.
20:10While we sheltered from the rain,
20:13Will showed me a bit of ground he'd already mapped out,
20:16so the Agbot could do a test run.
20:20So we've got to tell it where to start, where to stop.
20:24OK.
20:24This is where it gets very exciting.
20:26You'll like this.
20:27Calculate route.
20:29Ta-da!
20:30Route calculated successfully, right?
20:32Look at that, there it is.
20:33And we can see...
20:35Oh, so how many passes it's going to do?
20:37Yeah.
20:37And look, you can see what it's going to do,
20:38where it's going to turn.
20:39Got a nice light bulb turn there.
20:41Oh my God!
20:42It's worked out where to turn.
20:43It's worked out where to turn.
20:44There it needs to do a three point turn.
20:46So where it's orange, it's going in reverse.
20:48Amazing.
20:49And this is communicating with the machine.
20:52Because this is what...
20:53I have this thing about driverless cars,
20:57which are all the rage in the world of motoring.
20:59Yep.
20:59So you need to go and get groceries.
21:01So you get your car to go into town,
21:03which you can do, negotiate roundabouts,
21:06negotiate traffic lights,
21:07find a parking space and park in it.
21:09But then what?
21:10It can't go into the shop and get the groceries.
21:13You have to go with it.
21:14And if you go with it,
21:15you may as well drive it.
21:16Yeah.
21:17It's not difficult to drive a car.
21:18It's not tiring.
21:19So they're pointless.
21:21But this...
21:21I can set that going.
21:23I know I've got three and a half hours
21:25to go and do something else.
21:26Absolutely.
21:26This is...
21:28This is where autonomous driving really makes sense.
21:34After the rain had stopped,
21:36we climbed into the Range Rover
21:38and from the passenger seat,
21:39I piloted the Agbot to the test area.
21:43Here we go.
21:44So...
21:45Implement up.
21:48OK.
21:49And...
21:50Handbrake off.
21:54No way.
21:57Holy mother of God.
22:06That is fantastic.
22:11However,
22:12while the Agbot was chugging along nicely...
22:15Oh, yeah.
22:17Yeah.
22:17Us two in the cheap seats
22:19were struggling a bit.
22:26Stuck?
22:29Uh...
22:30Hang on.
22:32I've had a great idea.
22:34What we got?
22:40We're ready?
22:41Yeah, we're good to go, yeah?
22:42Steady as we go.
22:43Taking up the slack.
22:50Oh.
22:51You're having a laugh.
23:03Has anyone in the world ever towed themselves out
23:07while driving the vehicle that's doing the towing?
23:12Thanks to the Agbot,
23:14we eventually reached the field.
23:18where it could get on with its day job.
23:21Press and hold button one.
23:24Auto driving.
23:25It's now driving itself.
23:27It is.
23:27It's hunting for its start point.
23:29It's hunting for its start point.
23:30Yep.
23:30Like a dog.
23:33It's just...
23:34I'm not turning.
23:34I'm not turning that.
23:36I am not turning.
23:41It's at its start point.
23:43Press and hold button two.
23:45OK.
23:50And it's going.
23:52That's it.
23:53Wow.
24:04It's turning.
24:05You're turning.
24:06It's turning.
24:06Here it comes.
24:06It's turning.
24:17OK, it's done it.
24:20That's sold itself to me a thousand times over.
24:31İzlediğiniz için teşekkür ederim.
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25:52Evet.
26:23Evet.
26:25İzlediğiniz için teşekkür ederim.
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28:37I don't know, I don't know, I don't know, I don't know, I haven't been over there.
28:41But I mean, one of our, you know Ben, the cameraman?
28:45Yeah, yeah, yeah.
28:46He went over and was invited to, forgive the language, fuck off.
28:52And he was just...
28:54And he's not small?
28:54No, he's a pig lad.
28:56So now we need to know what their objectives are.
28:59Are they going to stay?
29:00Don't know.
29:01Or are they going to go...
29:02I don't know.
29:07Whoa, whoa, whoa. Where are you going?
29:09I've got to get over there.
29:10Where?
29:11The pub.
29:11You're not going to...
29:12There's chaos.
29:13You are not a diplomat and you have a dicky heart out.
29:17You're not going, Jeremy.
29:19Come on, let's go. Park that car back there now.
29:25Fortunately, Ben, the cameraman, refused the traveller's kind invitation to F off.
29:32And managed to keep filming with his camera and drone.
29:37Get out of the mix, ma'am, will you?
29:38Yeah, Charlie.
29:39Small Charlie's ringer, Brendan.
29:41And it soon became apparent the travellers were using our car park as a base for some kind of horse
29:48and buggy racing event on the nearby dual carriageway.
29:54There is very old bylaws.
29:56You are allowed to exercise your horse on the road, so they're totally allowed to do what they're doing here
30:00today.
30:01The police are all over it.
30:02They can't stop them.
30:04In terms of the farmer's dog pub and sight and our customers, nobody can get in.
30:07It's completely blocked.
30:12This meant we had no choice but to sit on our hands and wait.
30:31Four hours later, though, they finished up, went on their way, and we could finally get the pub open.
30:43They haven't left much litter, which I was worried about.
30:46We've done a litter pick.
30:47Oh, have you?
30:48They came.
30:49With just cans and stuff?
30:50Oh, no, syringes.
30:51They've obviously inject the horses.
30:53I'm not an expert, but...
30:54Syringes?
30:55Yeah.
30:56Shit.
30:57I know, and they've given me this.
31:02It's for your padlock and the rubbish that they left, and they hope that...
31:06Well, 150 quid.
31:07Yeah.
31:11So they break in...
31:13Yeah.
31:13...and then pay for the damage.
31:15Well, this is something...
31:16Yeah.
31:16Open a pub.
31:17It'll be fun.
31:19I have to.
31:19And then have problems like this to do.
31:20Yeah.
31:21Never expected this one.
31:27A couple of days later, with the fields drying nicely,
31:31we could at last get cracking with our new high-tech crop planting programme.
31:38Right.
31:38Ranging pole.
31:40This, we'll talk to this, and we'll record the points as we go around the field.
31:44Job one involved Agbot Will and I mapping the fields
31:48so that the Agbot's GPS system would know where it was.
31:52Save this point.
31:53Yeah, perfect.
31:55So now we go to the next point.
31:57Okay.
31:58If we're staying in line with a hedge, this is straight.
32:01Yep.
32:01Let's save that, shall we?
32:04Save.
32:05Right.
32:07Splitaways is mapped.
32:09While we were inputting all the data into the Agbot's brain...
32:12Oh, there it is.
32:14Yeah.
32:14Oh, wow, that's what we did.
32:16That's what we walked, yeah.
32:17Jacob, the Dutch potato farmer, was out in our fields.
32:22Taking underground readings so we'd know where the soil was good...
32:28...and where it wasn't.
32:36Jacob can look down into the centre of the earth...
32:39Yeah.
32:40...like an echo sander in a submarine.
32:42Something like that, yes.
32:43As he'd explained in Holland, red denoted the rich areas of soil and dark blue, the weaker patches.
32:52And with this information, we could now do targeted seed planting.
32:57If we get the Agbot, okay, and we say, when you're going over this red bit, pummel the ground, you
33:06know, like machine gunfire.
33:07When you're going over this blue bit, it changes the rate at which it's planting the seed.
33:14I already made a map for the Agbot, so you could drill variable.
33:19I made that map.
33:21And it wasn't just variable-rate seed planting.
33:24With this new information, we could now fertilise the field more efficiently by doing targeted muck spreading.
33:31And as a bonus, we had a mountain of rather special muck ready to go.
33:38That's not cow muck.
33:41Bet you can't guess what animal that came out of the back of.
33:46Nope, I'm afraid you're wrong.
33:50It actually came out of these guys.
33:53They live about ten miles away from Diddley Squatter to local tourist attraction.
34:00Here we are, the Coxfold Wildlife Park.
34:04And last year, Reggie, the owner, had said he'd be happy for us to help ourselves to everything that came
34:11out of their bottoms.
34:13I've always felt that this is quite special stuff, because actually, they've got a very short stomach, rhinos.
34:20And so it's very fibrous. It's full of nutritional material. It's much better than cow dums.
34:25So is it?
34:25Well, I think so, because cow dums had much more taken out of it. It's been because of the second
34:30stomach and all the rest of it.
34:31Whereas this stuff is neat. It even smells quite wholesome and fresh when it comes out the first time round.
34:36And it's just sort of ready to go.
34:38You're my new favourite person.
34:41Whilst our trailers were being loaded,
34:45We said goodbye to the donors.
34:48And then there was a little surprise for Caleb.
34:52See the baby camel there?
34:54Yeah.
34:54The little six-week-old one.
34:56Yeah.
34:56Just been talking to one of the people who work here.
34:59You know what they've called it?
35:00You know what?
35:01Caleb.
35:02Have they actually?
35:03Yeah, they have.
35:04Because it's got...
35:05It's had one of your endless hairstyles.
35:07It's got.
35:09So they said it looks like Caleb Cooper and they've named it Caleb.
35:12That's made my day.
35:13Look, you can see it's stupid hair.
35:15It's not stupid. It's great. Look at it.
35:17That's...
35:17Yeah, they've named it after you.
35:19Caleb.
35:25Back in the present, the dung from this prehistoric animal
35:29was about to be spread using space-age technology.
35:34When it goes over a red bit...
35:36It will put on...
35:37Less.
35:38Yeah.
35:38And then when it goes over a blue bit...
35:40You're putting more on the blue bits.
35:42Yeah.
35:43Technology blows my mind when I'm 26 years old.
35:45Imagine being a 60-year-old farmer sat here.
35:47Well, no, not you.
35:48But you...
35:50What are you?
35:51Do you know what I mean?
35:52No, no.
35:53This is because we went over the holland for the day.
35:55Yeah.
35:55And now look where we are.
35:57Now look at us.
35:57But if your yield goes through the roof...
35:59Through the roof, it's worth doing, isn't it?
36:00Yeah.
36:03All we needed now was for the technology to work.
36:16I know now he's coming up to a very good bit of soil.
36:19So the amount coming out of the back should reduce dramatically.
36:23And it has done, look.
36:24It has done.
36:27Looks hardly...
36:28And it's like a fine mist of feces.
36:31Jeez, I think it's working.
36:34Now look, it's getting thicker again.
36:38This is honestly amazing.
36:41On that corner, it went to five tonnes a hectare.
36:44Now I'm on 45 tonnes a hectare.
36:47Well, you're impressed with it?
36:50Really impressed.
36:52Well, now is the time to really surprise him.
36:56He he he he he he he he he.
36:59While Caleb carried on with his mathematical muck spreading...
37:04It's about under 25 now.
37:06I went to fetch the Agbot so he could start cultivating.
37:34When these lights on the top go green,
37:36the Agbot will know which field it's in and be ready to start work.
37:43Nick Green!
37:45I have done a good job.
37:53Right.
37:54What the fuck is that?
37:57The Agbot.
37:58I've made your tractor 21st century with its new stuff.
38:02This is the 24th century.
38:05I've mapped this field.
38:06I went all the way round it the other day with a prong.
38:08So it knows the field.
38:10And we're going to get it to its start point.
38:12I then go to the pub.
38:13It drives itself.
38:14We just would...
38:15Well, you can just go.
38:16Oh, yeah.
38:17And it will cultivate this field.
38:19What about if it blocks up?
38:21It'll ring me.
38:24What happens if you've snapped a tine?
38:26You wouldn't know that even if you're...
38:27Stop being negative.
38:28No, you would.
38:29I'll just look behind as I'm driving up and down the field.
38:32Come on, admit it.
38:33This is superb.
38:34It's Dutch.
38:36And I don't have to pay you to cultivate the field.
38:40That's basically taking my job.
38:41It has.
38:42Where's it going to start, then?
38:44It should start where you've been muck spreading.
38:46And it will do the steering to find its start point.
38:50Go on, then.
38:50Set it going.
38:51It's not going to work.
38:52It will.
38:53It won't.
38:59Should be turning left any minute now, which I'm not doing.
39:03Oh, yeah.
39:05Yes.
39:09Look at that.
39:11Is he going to drop it in, though?
39:12Hang on.
39:13Yay!
39:17Behold my technology at work.
39:26That is the Starship Enterprise of farming.
39:37Oh, he stopped.
39:39That went well.
39:40Shit.
39:41Error detected.
39:42Localisation.
39:43Joy lift.
39:45Hitch tall link.
39:47Fold off.
39:47What the fuck does all that?
39:48That's farmers.
39:49Fortunately, Agbot Will was on hand.
39:52Press and hold button two.
39:54No, we've got to get it off the handbrake, haven't we?
39:56Let go of two.
39:56Press the pause button.
40:00Please.
40:03And it stopped again.
40:05Oh, this is a great day to be alive.
40:07You're doing a great job cultivating.
40:09No, ignore him.
40:13What does Novotel messages are too late mean on it?
40:17It's not picking the GPS receiver up.
40:19For whatever reason, the message is delayed.
40:22It's not reading the satellite, sir?
40:24Not reading the satellite quick enough.
40:26Oh, for fuck's sake.
40:28Look at this lot.
40:29I'm going to get in the tractor and start up,
40:30and it's going to work.
40:32Just ignore him.
40:33He'll go away.
40:33OK.
40:37Listen!
40:40So it's scanning round to look at its environment,
40:44and then when it's happy, it'll go.
40:46Press and hold button two.
40:48One click.
40:49Press the pause button.
40:55Come on.
40:57Please, come on.
40:58Please, please, please work.
41:00Yes.
41:03Oh.
41:04I just stopped again.
41:06For fuck's sake.
41:17Are you all ready for your autonomous cars?
41:20Hope so.
41:21I'm not.
41:24So are they...
41:25The factory in Holland...
41:27Are looking at that.
41:28They're talking to that.
41:29They are talking to that.
41:29This is the problem.
41:31If it has an app, it won't work.
41:33If anyone can remotely access something,
41:36it won't work.
41:41Looks like it's going well over there.
41:44What's the factory saying now?
41:46Boot up.
41:49Finally, we were ready for another attempt.
41:54Right.
41:56Cultivator's gone down.
41:57I'm not doing that.
41:58Weight box is going down.
42:01Come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on.
42:05Come on.
42:08Yes.
42:10Yes.
42:12Yes.
42:14Come on.
42:15Come on, little fella.
42:18Doing it.
42:25When the Agbot finished its first pass and turned to do its second,
42:30I knew we were in business.
42:37Ah!
42:46Even Caleb was absolutely bowled over.
42:50Is it doing a good job?
42:52Yes, it's all right.
43:03And that's it.
43:05And I can go and get on with another job.
43:15Sadly, it was a job I was dreading.
43:21Because ever since David the butcher had shown me what a small amount of meat my pigs were producing,
43:30I'd known there was only one option.
43:39I love the pigs.
43:41I have absolutely...
43:44I've just been delighted with every day I'm down there.
43:47They make me heart sing.
43:49I'm so happy with them.
43:51But we're running a business here.
43:53Yep.
43:55And they'd make no financial sense at all.
44:04And so, over the next few days, we'd be saying goodbye to all of them.
44:12Hello, wieners.
44:18You are funny.
44:25I mean, they're going off anyway.
44:27It's time for them to be...
44:31...moved on.
44:34The difference this time, though, is that there'd be no new piglets to replace them.
44:54These are all the swells and clumsies.
44:57These are the master of the boys.
45:00That's it.
45:01There you go.
45:03Go on.
45:18They had a good life, didn't they?
45:20Yeah.
45:20Not a very long life.
45:27It was even harder to say goodbye to the next group.
45:31Because it included one of the mothers from the first batch we'd bought three years earlier.
45:37Oh, surprise.
45:42It was the first pig we had that gave birth.
45:53Come on.
45:57Come on, girl.
45:59Remember, it's for the better good.
46:02What?
46:03It's for the better good.
46:04It's still fucking sad.
46:13All good?
46:14Well, no, not really, because of the poor old surprise.
46:16As long as you cry once I've left, I'm not too worried about it.
46:19I'm not going to cry.
46:20Are you sure?
46:23All right, thanks, Jess.
46:24Take care of yourself.
46:24Safe travels.
46:25Thanks, Caleb.
46:26See you later, Jess.
46:42Finally, the day came to say goodbye to the last two original mothers.
46:49Clumsy and Suez.
46:53A lot of happy memories from them.
46:55I know.
46:57The one bit of good news in this whole sad saga
47:01is that these two had at least been saved from the slaughterhouse.
47:06They're going off to a farm where it's like a school,
47:10so children go and they go, these are pigs.
47:13Oh, girls, you love it.
47:15So they're going to have a...
47:17They're going to be headmistresses in a school.
47:19Yeah, well, they're going off to be exhibits in a school.
47:23Are you going to keep their names?
47:24Yes.
47:25Clumsy and Suez.
47:26Clumsy and Suez, yeah.
47:27They're going to be very good names.
47:28Well, that's the important thing, because they're brilliant, these two.
47:32No, I couldn't really have handled it.
47:34If they'd gone off to be eaten.
47:37You know they've had four batches of piglets, Lisa.
47:40Do you know how many they've had in total between them?
47:43No.
47:43Four lots, yeah?
47:45Four lots, yeah?
47:45Seventy pigs.
47:46They've survived.
47:47Seventy?
47:48Seventy.
47:48Seventy.
47:48Good girls.
47:50That's pretty good, actually.
47:51Oh, look.
47:52Here we go.
47:53Here we go.
47:54Here we go.
47:54You are dealing with clumsy there.
47:57Oh, well done, Lisa.
48:00Well done, Lisa.
48:00Nurse Swizz waiting.
48:01Look, patiently.
48:03Hello, Swizz.
48:05Who is it, the pig?
48:06Who is it, the pig?
48:09Who is it, the pig?
48:09Who is it, the pig?
48:11We're going to miss you.
48:13We're going to miss you.
48:19Come on, Swizz.
48:22Come on.
48:23Here we go.
48:24Here we go.
48:26Come on.
48:28Come on.
48:35All right, Mark, safe travels.
48:36Yeah, no worries.
48:37Thank you very much.
48:38Thank you.
48:38Thanks a lot.
48:54Well done, you gave them a great life.
48:56Oh, my God.
48:59Never.
49:01Never.
49:10Come on, piggies.
49:12Welcome to diddly-squat.
49:14Oh, you're so cute.
49:17Aren't they just the best?
49:18It's not time to make a change.
49:22Just relax.
49:24Take it easy.
49:25You're still young.
49:27Uh-oh.
49:28The sow is now going to join Lisa.
49:31Jeremy!
49:34Who's going to look after them?
49:35Settle down if you want to tell me.
49:38You're having sex.
49:40Lovely romantic.
49:41It's very wide.
49:43Get the briskets, darling.
49:44Get the briskets.
49:45Which one for?
49:47What the bloody hell is that?
49:49Has one of the pigs been sick in my pocket?
49:53When you're not here, COVID.
50:00Put a new set to long bearing up, which is easily done, yes?
50:05Hey.
50:12Oh, she's out of the teeth.
50:13Good little one.
50:15Well done, Mum.
50:17Ten piggies.
50:19This is the best bit of farming I've had so far, darling.
50:27She's obviously squashing them.
50:29Oh, no.
50:47I hate to admit this, yes?
50:51Clarkson's ring, it worked.
50:53Oh, my God.
50:55There's loads.
50:57Oh, my God.
51:00There's loads.
51:06Look how feisty he's become.
51:09That is Richard Hammond, if you spill his pint.
51:12If they were right, I'd agree.
51:15But it's them they know, not me.
51:20Calm the down, look.
51:21And I know that I have to go away.
51:26I know I have to go.
51:39Follow Caleb.
51:40This is Houston Control.
51:41Mate, you've logged into my tractor.
51:43Call me Flight.
51:44The first dare food night at the farmer's dog.
51:46Lamb's brain here.
51:48Stuffed heart.
51:48Have you smelt it?
51:50You make you crazy in a mouth.
51:53RP33.
51:54Yep.
51:55You found a grant.
51:55They pay us to slow the water down.
51:58That machine is amazing.
52:00Endgame's first child.
52:03There's a head.
52:04It's all yours now, yeah?
52:04It's all yours.
52:05It's all yours.